Who I am
My name is Allison Nastoff. I am 33 years old and live in Wisconsin. I hold a Bachelor’s in Communication with a journalism emphasis from Carroll University, and a paralegal certificate from Milwaukee Area Technical College. I worked for five years as a paralegal for a law firm that handled Social Security disability claims, but the pandemic inspired me to resign from this position and pursue a certificate in Christian Studies from Trinity Evangelical Divinity School. I am also blind, the result of a brain tumor that destroyed my optic nerve as a baby. You may follow me on my other substack, or my wordpress blog Gilbert and Me (named for my first guide dog and beloved companion for twelve years). In 2021, I self-published a memoir, The Rivers of My Life, the text of which is available for free on Gilbert and Me, but you can also support my writing by listening to me reading it on Audible.
My Religious Views
I was raised Catholic, but until high school, I really didn’t take faith seriously. I was introduced to the evangelical movement when I discovered the Left Behind Series my freshman year of high school. It wasn’t long into this first book that something clicked in my mind and I realized that the Bible wasn’t just an ancient book of stories that offer moral insights for our lives but a story that is still unfolding, and which we are all a part of, and this was thrilling to me. It was very important to my dad’s family that we were raised Catholic, so I continued attending Catholic mass, and received the sacrament of Confirmation my junior year of high school. I took the sacrament seriously, even asked Grandma to be my sponsor as she was a beautiful faith influence in my life. But I viewed this sacrament as a commitment to follow Christ, not necessarily the Catholic church. My freshman year of college, I had the opportunity to attend the nondenominational church with a friend, and I loved the passion of the evangelical movement, the less scripted prayers, the belief that you can confess sins directly to God rather than through the priest, and the sermons which were much more bible-centered. Due to various circumstances which I discuss in my memoir, I had to continue attending the Catholic church for awhile after that. But In 2013, I switched to the nondenominational Protestant church and since then, my faith has flourished.
Going to church is the highlight of my week. The Scriptures are beautiful, an infinite reservoir of timeless truth and wisdom, a source of hope and comfort when times are tough, “simple enough on the surface for a child to wade in, but complex enough for an elephant to swim in.” I have no plans to ever abandon this faith because I know how beautiful it is when practiced in its true form. And yet, I understand why some of my peers have left the church. Some of my peers have rejected the faith in favor of a purely scientific worldview and in this matter, only God can change their hearts. But I believe there are many young people who resemble the late Rachel Held Evans. They love the real Jesus of the Bible and have fond memories of the evangelical tradition. But they are disillusioned by the racism, the self-righteous, judgmental comments, the hypocrisy. I believe a major contributor to these problems is the disease of Christian Nationalism. It is this disease I seek to address.
What is Christian Nationalism?
According to Christians Against Christian Nationalism, Christian Nationalism “seeks to merge Christian and American identities, distorting both the Christian faith and America’s constitutional democracy.” It demands that the state grant preferential treatment to Christianity, and implies that being Christian is required to be a good American. It also overlaps with, and has been used to condone white supremacy and racial subjugation.
In the interest of full disclosure, I should mention here that I do not support Donald Trump, and while I consider myself to be an independent, I usually vote for Democrats because even as a teenager, something always bothered me about the way conservative politicians pandered to Christians, but didn’t have the words to explain why. When Donald Trump was elected in 2016, I couldn’t believe how many Christians, including many of my friends, extended family, even Bible study classmates could condone such a morally bankrupt person. So it was fascinating to study church history and learn that historians were not at all surprised by his election. It is an extreme manifestation of Christian Nationalism, which always experiences a resurgence during eras of fear and uncertainty. But this ideology existed long before Donald Trump and will probably exist long after he is out of the picture. The conservative politicians that bothered me as a teenager were the less extreme form of this ideology. Though this ideology is associated mostly with conservative politicians right now, I promise that I will behave myself and not let this blog become a political rant, because the Bible calls us to stay out of overt politics, because party platforms have reversed in our history, and because all parties fall short of God’s righteous standards, so endorsing any politician would be idolatry. And Jonathan Walton, an excellent Black Christian writer on this issue has shown that politicians from both parties embrace this ideology to some extent. So if I mention a particular politician, I will strive to be fair and give equal time to examples of how the other party has fallen prey to this ideology as well.
The Mission of this Blog
A few weeks ago, our pastor gave a sermon on the parable of the lost sheep, and he told the story of how he and his wife were terrified when they realized they had lost track of their young daughter years ago on a family vacation. Their daughter was quickly found, happily looking at something in a shop window, and didn’t even seem to realize she was lost. I fear this is the state of many Christians today, and what breaks my heart even more is that many of these lost sheep are nice people I know and love dearly. You are my cheerful neighbor I meet on a walk who says they are blessed when I ask how you are doing. Your adorable puppy might come up and sniff my shoe while we engage in small talk about the gorgeous weather. You are the person in Bible study who knows how to pray for someone going through a difficult time when the rest of us cannot find the words, and go out of your way to check on someone who hasn’t come in awhile. You are the relative who loves me and would be the first to respond in a time of need. But then you will parrot something incredibly racist or disparaging to immigrants, women or even people with disabilities and my jaw will drop for a second. There will be an awkward pause, and then, not wanting to cause trouble, and not even knowing what to say in the moment even if I did, I will change the subject back to your puppy, or ask if you tried Aunt Nancy’s fruit salad. It’s delicious! This blog is my attempt to speak the truth in love to you, in a way that is as gentle as a dove. On my other blogs, I am a long-winded writer, as I like to let my thoughts unfurl slowly, reflectively, but I recognize that in this fast-paced world, this style doesn’t appeal to everyone, so I will strive to keep my posts to 1,200 words or less (the typical word limit I have seen in the submission criteria for most publications I follow).
I believe the Deceiver has led you astray through partisan media, and I sense God asking me to help bring you back to true Christianity. I recognize that only God can truly transform hearts, and that this little blog is the David against the Goliath of partisan media. But maybe if I can play a small role in countering bad speech with good speech, I can make a difference. I also want to be humble and recognize I am flawed like everyone else, so I welcome constructive criticism if you disagree, as long as it is made in good faith, in the spirit of the friendly neighbor.
